After the workshop

After the workshop

Things to consider

As I mentioned before, I was a bit apprehensive about discussing my story, but in the end it was very interesting to see the way people had perceived it. It made me realise how much was really just in my head, or perhaps, between the words. I actually felt like I had been too explicit in my descriptions but in reality the story seemed to confuse most of the readers. To be honest, I was trying to confuse the readers but not to the extent that I couldn't communicate what was in my head. I think the main points of confusion were the changing point of view and the lack of anchoring, perhaps around the main character. Luckily, this week we are looking at point of view, so this might help me.

Filling in the gaps

I also found it interesting the way readers almost create their own idea of a story in the spaces where you left a gap. I noticed this when we spoke about Ronan's piece in which each of us had created a slightly different image in our heads or simply read a word in a way that it fit with our idea. This means that if you want to transmit something specific you need to make it very clear through details. This will be my main focus.

This can be compared to what happens with visual illusions such as the Kanizsa triangle (Kanizsa, G 1955).

Kanizsa triangle

Although no triangle exists in this image the black circles at each corner trick the viewer into seeing one while in a story, we use details create an image in the heads of the readers. Readers will fill in the gaps, but a skilful writer should be able to control the way these gaps are filled by manipulating the details or black circles.

Questions to consider

These were the questions that came up which I will reflect on for my second draft.

1. Who is who?
2. What is it really about?
3. Do you get the feeling that he is a teenager?
4. Why does the boy want a promotion? (I might even change the wording here as it sounds adult)
5. How does he get paid?
6. What is the offer at the end?
7. Is it what he wants?
8. Does he get it?
9. What is happening in the world?
10. Is there a war?
11. Is the character for or against war?